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If someone you met on a dating app used a false identity or relationship to get money or sensitive information, stop contact and do not send anything else. Contact the payment provider you used right away to ask whether the transaction can be stopped, reversed, disputed, or refunded; recovery is not guaranteed. Then report the profile and scam, and secure any accounts or devices the person may have accessed.
The steps below reflect guidance from U.S. federal agencies. If you are outside the United States, use your country’s consumer-protection and police reporting channels.
What should I do if I was scammed by someone I met on a dating app?
Act promptly, but take one step at a time. You do not need to pay anyone or buy a service to begin responding.
- Stop contact. Do not send more money, gifts, login codes, financial details, or intimate material. Do not click links or open files they sent. The FBI advises ending contact with a suspected romance scammer.
- Tell someone you trust. Ask a friend or family member to help you take the next steps and keep track of what happened. The FTC recommends talking with someone you trust; outside perspective can also help when you feel pressured or embarrassed.
- Contact the payment provider immediately. Call the bank, credit union, card issuer, payment app, wire-transfer company, or other service you used. Explain that the payment was induced by a scam, provide the transaction details, and ask whether it can be stopped, recalled, reversed, disputed, or refunded. The FTC recommends contacting the company or bank used to send the money. If you see other suspicious transactions, report them too. What the provider can do depends on the payment method and its process; no outcome is assured.
- Save evidence and report the profile. Where safe and practical, preserve the person’s profile information, username, messages, payment requests, and transaction records before you lose access. Then use the dating app’s reporting process. The FBI advises reporting the account to the service where you met; the FTC also recommends notifying the dating site or app.
- Report the scam to the appropriate U.S. agencies. Submit a fraud report to the FTC at ReportFraud.ftc.gov. If the crime involved the internet, report it to the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3); the FBI also lists a local field office as a reporting option. If the person is threatening you or extorting you, include that in your report. For immediate physical danger, contact local emergency services.
- Secure accounts and devices if you shared access. From a device you trust, change exposed passwords, make each password unique, enable two-factor authentication where available, and review account activity and transactions. Contact the relevant financial or online-account providers if access or account details were exposed. If the person accessed your computer or phone, the FTC advises updating security software and scanning the device. It also suggests seeking help from a company you know and trust or a knowledgeable person if malware needs removal.
Can I get my money back?
Possibly, but there is no universal recovery route or guarantee. Your options depend on how you paid, the provider’s rules, and how quickly you contact it. Call the provider as soon as you can and ask specifically whether the payment can still be stopped, recalled, reversed, disputed, or refunded. Give it the transaction date, amount, recipient details, and any reference numbers you have.
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Keep a record of when you contacted the provider, who you spoke with, and any case or dispute number. Follow its instructions and report any later suspicious transactions. The FBI’s IC3 advises contacting your financial institution promptly to request that suspicious transactions be stopped or reversed, but the provider determines what action is available for your transaction.
What if I sent cryptocurrency or gift cards?
Contact the service or business involved promptly and explain that the payment was part of a scam. If you used an exchange, payment app, bank, card, or gift-card issuer to make the purchase or transfer, ask it what reporting or dispute options apply and provide the transaction details. Save receipts, card numbers, wallet addresses, transaction IDs, and messages if available.
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Do not send more money because the person says it is needed to unlock a refund, release funds, or complete a recovery. The available steps and chances of recovery vary by payment channel; the cited federal guidance does not establish a guaranteed way to recover cryptocurrency or gift-card value.
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- The dating app or platform: Use its report process for the profile and preserve relevant information first if it is safe and practical. The FBI’s 2024 warning about fake dating verification schemes also advises reporting suspicious profiles.
- FTC: Report fraud at ReportFraud.ftc.gov.
- FBI IC3: Report internet-enabled criminal activity at ic3.gov. The FBI’s 2019 guidance also identifies a local FBI field office as an option.
- Emergency services: If you face immediate physical danger, contact local emergency services rather than waiting for an online report to be handled.
These agency routes are for the United States. Elsewhere, report through your own country’s consumer-protection and police channels.
What if I shared my password, financial details, or device access?
Use a trusted device and work through the affected accounts. Start with email and financial accounts, since access to them can put other accounts at risk.
- Change exposed passwords and any other accounts where you reused them. Do not reuse the replacement password.
- Turn on two-factor authentication for accounts that offer it, and review recent sign-ins, recovery details, and transactions.
- Contact your bank, card issuer, or account provider if financial or login information was exposed. Ask what additional protections or account changes it recommends.
- If the person accessed your device, update its security software and run a scan. If you suspect malware and cannot remove it confidently, get help from a trusted company or knowledgeable person.
A hardware FIDO2 security key is an optional form of account authentication for services that support it; it does not recover money, report the scam, or remove malware. First use the free password and account-security steps above.
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What warning signs may point to a dating-app scam?
A warning sign is not proof by itself. The FTC and FBI describe patterns that can become more concerning when several appear together:
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- The person quickly tries to move the conversation away from the dating service.
- They claim distance or another reason prevents meeting in person, while building an intense relationship online.
- They ask for money for an emergency, another supposed need, or an investment in cryptocurrency or stocks.
- They try to isolate you from friends or family, pressure you for intimate photos or financial information, tell inconsistent stories, or repeatedly make excuses to avoid meeting.
- They send a link for supposedly free dating safety verification that asks for personal and card details. The FBI has warned that such links can lead to recurring subscription charges.
Someone moving a chat or being unable to meet is not, on its own, proof of fraud. Treat requests for money, sensitive information, or suspicious links as reasons to pause and verify independently.
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What if I shared intimate photos or am being threatened?
Do not send more images, money, or information to satisfy a threat. Save the messages, account details, and payment demands if it is safe to do so, then report the account to the platform and include the threats in your report to the appropriate authorities. If you are in immediate physical danger, contact local emergency services. Do not assume that paying will end the threats.
How can I avoid a second scam?
Be wary of unsolicited people or services promising guaranteed recovery of your money, especially if they ask for an upfront fee, account credentials, or a transfer to “release” funds. Verify any contact independently through the official provider or agency channel, not through a link or phone number sent by the person who approached you.
Reporting can help agencies and platforms identify activity, but it does not guarantee that a payment will be recovered or that a particular person will be identified. In 2018, FBI Washington Field Office Special Agent in Charge Timothy R. Slater said: “We recognize that it may be embarrassing for victims to report this type of fraud scheme because of the personal relationships that are developed, but we ask for victims to come forward so the FBI can ensure that these online imposters are brought to justice.”
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