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A dating-app match who builds trust quickly, avoids meeting, moves you to private messaging, and then asks for money may be running a romance scam. None of those behaviors alone proves fraud. The clearest safety rule is simpler: do not send money or gifts to a love interest you have not met in person—no matter how urgent the story sounds.

What warning patterns should you look for?

Romance scams often unfold gradually. A person may start with frequent, affectionate messages, then offer reasons they cannot meet and eventually introduce a money problem or investment opportunity. The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) describes this sequence in its consumer guidance, Looking for love? Watch out for scammers (February 2025) and What To Know About Romance Scams (August 2022).

  • They push to leave the dating app. A match may quickly ask to switch to email, phone, or another messaging service. That move can be part of a scam pattern, but it does not by itself establish that the person is a scammer.
  • They have a reason they cannot meet. They may say they are far away for work or military service, repeatedly cancel plans, or keep postponing an in-person meeting. Ask yourself the FTC’s practical question: “Why can’t that new love interest meet in person?”
  • They create a sense of closeness or urgency. Frequent messages and declarations of love can build trust before a request arrives. The story may involve a medical bill, travel ticket or visa, legal trouble, or another urgent expense.
  • They introduce money or investing. A request to send funds is a serious warning. So is an offer to help you invest in cryptocurrency or stocks. Do not treat investment advice from a new online love interest as proof of care or expertise.

Technology, including AI, may make scams harder to recognize, the FTC noted in a February 2026 alert. The alert does not provide a dependable way to determine whether a photo or message was AI-generated, so visual inspection cannot reliably authenticate a match.

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What should you do before sending money or gifts?

Do not send money or gifts to someone you have not met in person. The FTC’s guidance is explicit: “Never send money or gifts to a sweetheart you haven’t met in person.” Pause before responding to any request, including one framed as a loan, emergency, travel cost, gift-card code, or investment.

Take these lower-risk checks

  1. Pause and talk with someone you trust. Share the messages and the request with a friend or family member who is not emotionally involved. Treat their concern as a reason to slow down and examine the story.
  2. Search the claimed job with “scammer.” The FTC suggests searches such as “oil rig scammer” or “US Army scammer.” Look for accounts of similar stories, not just a matching name.
  3. Reverse-image-search the profile photo. Look for the same image paired with another name or details that do not fit. A search that finds nothing does not prove the profile is genuine.
  4. Do not test or confront the person to prove who they are. These checks can surface inconsistencies, but no single clue or search result verifies an identity. If the situation feels suspicious, stop communicating and report the account to the dating app or site where you met.

Why are payment requests especially risky?

Scammers may ask for wire transfers, gift cards and PINs, payment-app transfers, or cryptocurrency. These payment routes can be difficult to reverse, particularly once a gift-card code is shared or a crypto transfer is complete. A request to use one of them is not a reason to try a smaller payment; it is a reason not to send anything.

The FTC reported in an April 2026 data spotlight that nearly 60% of people who reported losing money to a romance scam in 2025 said the scam started on social media. The FTC also reported $298 million in 2025 losses to romance scams that originated on social media. Those figures describe reported losses in the social-media-origin group; they are not estimates of how many dating-app users encounter scammers or how prevalent scams are among dating-app matches.

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What if you already sent money?

Contact the company that handled the payment as soon as possible, explain that it was fraud, and ask whether the transaction can be stopped, reversed, or refunded. A refund is not guaranteed, and the options depend on the provider and transaction.

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How you paid Who to contact first Useful next step
Bank transfer Your bank or credit union Ask whether it can stop or reverse the transfer.
Payment app The payment app Report the fraudulent transfer and ask about recovery options.
Wire transfer The wire-transfer company Ask immediately whether the transfer can be cancelled or recovered.
Credit or debit card Your card issuer or bank Report the charge as fraud and ask about disputing it.
Gift card The gift-card issuer Keep the card and receipt, if available, and report the scam.
Cryptocurrency The exchange or ATM operator you used Report the transaction and ask what steps, if any, are available.

Also report the account to the dating platform and file a report with the FTC at ReportFraud.ftc.gov. The FTC’s What To Do if You Were Scammed (June 2026) includes further steps for payment fraud and, where relevant, exposed personal information or compromised accounts.

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